your ex dropped by. you can call me dwight howard, cuz im the king of rebounds
Today should be called shooting fish in a barrel day. Every place ive gone to ive met a girl who regrets not hooking up last night. There have not been girls this easy since Fathers Day
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
You tipped the bathroom lady $20 and then yelled "IT'S YOUR LUCKY DAAAAAAAY" at her.
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
Randomize