i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
I immediately knew he was tripping, he came over with a grocery bag of snow balls and a bike helmet on and asked if I was prepared to die for my country.
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
I just want my kids to know I fucked some really hot dudes before their father.
You're going to scar your kids
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
My penis definitely considers my Captain Cock costume a success
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
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