in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
i just checked to make sure valentines day this year was on a weekend assuming ill want to be drunk all day
hearing about your life makes me feel so good about mine
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
Just snuck alcohol into the hospital for my mom.
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
Randomize
