he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
The voicemail says i shouldn't bother ever showing my face there again, i don't understand
We visited your boss last night. guess you wont be paying the rent this month, eh?
Cancel that soberness update. I just almost fell down in the security line
My autobiography is now tentatively titled "I'm Fucking the DJ, and Other Ways to Party for Cheap"
Babysitting for someone you accidently sent nudies to is so fucking awkward.
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
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