Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
Math equation of the day: 4 waffles + 1 bowl of weed = 1 terrific nap
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
My brother and I have had one conversation in the past like 3 weeks and it was about what it would be like as a sentient butt plug
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
we're so committed to being not committed
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
When you start lapping your martini like a cat it's time to go home. Partys over.
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