Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
nothing screams I HAVE A PROBLEM! like the case of miller lite sitting on top of my DUI papers in the passenger seat of my car. lol
Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
I was in the bathroom and I heard a phone ding inside one of the stalls. I really wanted to say, nature is calling, but I was still in my work uniform
He drunk texted me what I think is two snails fucking on a mushroom. Is "you sick bastard" too mild a rejection?
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
Randomize
