I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
say penis size is all related to how funny you are and then tell a feminist joke. if she laughs, you got double points, if she slaps you, she probably wasn't going to sleep with you anyway
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
You were discovered in a bush, smoking, and singing "in the jungle" to yourself. Which explains the scratches, but not the orange paint.
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
Apparently i tried to feed this guy's piranhas my whole left arm.. according to him, i was "showing them whos boss, bc if they try to eat my arm, im guna punch their face"
It feels weird going to sleep without hugging the toilet goodnight
Randomize
