You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
I have carpet burn on my ass, I'm rethinking my decisions last night.
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
Voted patient of the month again at the urgent care. I need to rethink my life choices.
Road construction signs are deceptively heavy
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
Stop calling me, Mom. I'm in his closet. You're gonna blow my cover and I'm about to catch this lying SOB.
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
Randomize
