Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
i'm watching a show about a girl who died from masterbating with a carrot. A FUCKING CARROT, EMILY! YOU NEED TO BE CAREFUL!
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
If you're wondering where your left shoe is you lost it in a bet with a homeless guy last night
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
How would I get in touch with Carly Rae Jepsen if I wanted to thank her for the loss of my virginity?
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
Just realized i left my bra at his house. WHY do i suck at one night stands?!
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
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