shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
I have surprise drugs for everyone
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
i just wrote an ode to an enchilada dorito. i'll need that pregnancy test now please.
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
I snapchatted him nudes and he didn't screenshot a single one of them because he's a gentleman.
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
Despite breaking my phone, thumb, and my dignity, last night was pretty good.
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
Randomize
