They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
Randomize
