I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
Somewhere out there, on several phones belonging to strangers, exists a video of me rapping Baby Got Back on stage in four inch heels that I stole from the drag queen. Also I made out with the chick with the octopus tattoo.
You have the best birthdays
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
I just found a bag of chex mix in my clutch
You were feeding it to the bartender last night
Randomize
