I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
Hindsight: maybe I should have included a few transitional texts in between talking about your son and my need to have sex. Do over?
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
i tried giving myself a bikini wax.1. i hate you 2. i think i'm dying
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
Randomize
