in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
it's too hot outside to masturbate.
so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
i told him i was allergic to semen. he pulled out an epipen.
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
Rule #61 of being a lady: never get fingered by a finger with a knuckle tattoo
You threw your body across the gross couple hooking up on the couch and demanded they scratch your back. I love you drunk on peach schnapps
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
the bouncer just handed me a Starbucks bag of pound cake
Randomize
