this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
i think i should save myself the $200 for a prom dress. i mean why bother. its just going to be covered in vodka/jizz/and puke by the end of the night.
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
Last night: Repeatedly yelled about how the fishbowl tasted like blue, stole a stranger's hat, hugged the DJ for playing my request, made out with my roommate, and abandoned the guy I dragged to the club in the first place
This morning: Hat doesn't fit, hangover headache is blue, and I can't move without getting lightheaded
Listen when they tell you not to drink after giving blood
Side note. I love it when I think I've sobered up and then I get a second wind of drunk
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
is that a dick in a sweater?
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
And you know what the worst part is? Because of him I can now relate to a goddamn Taylor Swift song. FUCK. MY. LIFE.
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
Randomize
