I can tuck mytits in my pants
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
$5 long island pitchers = roommate pissing on his laptop at 3am.
Why the fuck is the royal wedding at 4am. That is obviously not the most appropriate time to drink during finals. It's like I'm bound to fail, by royal decree.
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
Finished my senior thesis. How am I celebrating you ask? By drinking gas station white zif out of an empty candle holder by myself. I fucking deserve to graduate.
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
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