Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
If it wasnt for my iphone and loopt, I would still be wandering the streets in a drunken stooper. Thanks Steve Jobs.
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
you poured 3 beers into an empty vase and then passed out, so i drank them for you. don't say i'm not a good friend.
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
A university police officer just hhigh fived me when i drunkenly stumbled into Aderhold. Fucking 5 o'clock somewhere.ITS IN CASABLANCA RIGHT NOW! TIME ZONES!
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
He's single. I'm single. We should rekindle our eighth grade romance over a box of wine and carefree sex.
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
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