gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I
Had sex with the ex last night. Regretting to begin in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1... WHYYYYYYYYYY!
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
Road construction signs are deceptively heavy
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
He sent me a poorly photoshopped picture of his shaved dick wearing a Hot Dog on A Stick titled "Shorndog"...
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
yeah, I woke up with nacho cheese crusted all over my face and head...a lone jalapeno still stuck in my ear...you win this round drunk nachos....
Just find a separated / divorcing man. They’re too upset to fall in love, too helpless to be alone and too horny to think straight. Smile at him the right way and he’ll be thrilled to be with a sexy younger woman!
Randomize