i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
I found my laptop, credit card, and a bottle of Morgan all on the counter this morning. I'm scared to see what gets delivered to my house this week.
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
Apparently tackling a bar stool and crashing to the floor while yelling for 6 shots of whiskey won't get you thrown out on St Pattys Day.
The only coherent words in the 6 texts i recieved were don't, cute, fucking, beer, and lions
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
I gave a very stressed out cashier a mini bottle from my purse the day after Christmas. It's what Jesus would have done.
You're a good person. Sharing is caring.
You guys I wore sweatpants to work today because I simply forgot to put on real pants and I had a weed brownie and a juice box for breakfast. I am not ready for parenting.
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
Randomize
