Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
Anne I just took two ambiens. I think my body is melting into my blow up bed. Like a stick of butter just slowly melting. And I'm alright. Don't be afraid. I'll be alright.
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
I'm gonna go parent style on your ass... I don't ask much from you but if you could please just come get shitfaced with me I would really appreciate it
I want you to know. From the bottom of my heart, that you are a great friend, a beautiful person, and one of my favorite people in this world. But if you ever send me that many messages again at 4am I swear to God, I will push you in from of a fast running rhino
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