Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
she smelled like a LAN party
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
You're having sex and i just smoked and made oatmeal...i'll give you some time to be jealous
If you dedicate your next bite to me, I'll dedicate my first orgasm to you.
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
The amount I want to die right now is not proportionate to the level of fun I had last night. Not fair.
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
When we got into his bed, his damn parrot started making sex noises in the other room
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