Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
He asked to "fluff my boner.."
Someone shit on the floor
He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
Just woke up. I have a "Detective Jacob Arnold's" business card in my pocket.
This is how we made chicken soup last night: Whole chicken in a pot of vodka with a box of crackers and some carrots. We should go pro.
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
Randomize
