I murdered the dance floor call the cops
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
You're a goddess. Probably of destruction and dick jokes, or some shit, but man, lesser bitches wish they could be half as fab.
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
WHY DID YOU INVITE ALEX?!?
Because she offered to bring a keg.
And also because you fucked her in an alley last week and I'm trying to be a good friend.
The convent might be a nice break from real life
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
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