did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
There was already gay porn open on my laptop with a tiny carrot cake, a bottle of water, and a note saying "I love you, Sober Me."
Drunk me just hits it and quits it.
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
Randomize
