We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
I just followed up on a noise complaint...only to find 2 girls in bikinis covered in jello with beer cans everywhere. I couldn't bring myself to bust that party.
I want to be a cop.
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
I just realized I have my pepper spray, gun, and vibrator all in one drawer. One false grab and I'm screwed either way.
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
Randomize
