i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
So. Did i wake up at 430, try to drive home, stop to throw up at a shell, and try to clean out my car and drop my keys in a full dumpster? Yes.
2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
i woke up with a grocery list signed by "the people who ate all your shit while you were passed out"
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
i need you to come over and tell me if you can notice that i'm only wearing a teddy underneath my trenchcoat
Randomize