OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
what do 4 police cars, 1 ambulence, and 2 fire truycks have in common?.... My driveway
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
He just snapchatted me a picture of his cock. The angle makes it look like a freakin skyscraper. Thinking of photoshopping a little monkey on it.
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
I think it's a bit on the nose for the Uber driver to play stairway to heaven while driving like A psycho.
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