Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
I just got cut off for correcting the bartender's grammar. I should have never accepted that fucking editors position.
I just got my inseam measured in raffle tickets by a drag queen. Being fondled for charity is awesome.
Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?
I'm skyping with my parents and reading Cosmo articles on giving great head. I'm on a roller coaster that only goes up, baby.
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
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