Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
I recommend we watch the Super Bowl together and have celebratory sex if we win. Good news is I don't have a team I dislike so were guaranteed a win.
I think I was the only one who knew you were acting like you weren't drunk in public issues discussion this morning. Make sure you thank me in your Academy Award Speech someday.
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
i found 4 slices of pizza in my toaster, and a can of unopened soup in my blender.. wtf?
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
I love you, but seriously, that was way too long a thesis on an Arby’s curly fry being wrapped around schlong!
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