his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
im destined to be single forever. i hope its okay if your kids come and hang out with my cats.
I wish the sun would stop judging me for being drunk while it's still shining.
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
Either I'm too drunk or she gave me a hand job to the rhythm of jingle bells.
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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