I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
We had a race to see who could chug their vodka tonic faster. College doesn't seem to be working for me... I'm getting exponentially dumber
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
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