wake up i wanna do it froggy style
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
He said I was the "egg mcmuffin" of blowjobs. I'm flattered.
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
I was puking for like ten minutes when I realized my parents were fucking in the shower and were afraid to come out
Randomize
