its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
i'm not sure when it happened but apparently now it's topless bar night, im wearing a leotard and everyone is looking at me like i'm cheating.
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
Randomize
