you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
I finally got out of bed at 8:30pm and my little brother informed me that I had cereal stuck to my back. I'm going to smoke a cigarette and go back to sleep.
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
You can either drink his whiskey or be a bitch. Doing both is just mean.
Valentine's Day is now to be known as Tacos and Orgasms Day.
There are some people who should not be trusted with a cell phone while drunk. You know your one of them when you call the cops on your own party.
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
Randomize
