You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
She gave me what I will now dub a "hurricane sandy". Loud, wet and sloppy BJ that made me want to stay home and complain about shit on the Internet
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
alicia just called me and talked to me in "the eternal language of the dinosaurs" and then kind of roared and gurgled. what kind of 4th of july are you guys having?
the boozy kind. is there any other?
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
Randomize
