I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
Walking out of our apartment this morning to go to class, I saw a sticky note on the front door that said "get tested." The door was unlocked so did you bring some stranger back last night? I'm assuming you weren't referring to me...
I know. he thinks we're 'meant to be'. No we're fucking not. God wouldn't give my soulmate a pencil dick.
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
I'm at home, drunk, and I just called the guy I lost my virginity to and invited him to my wedding.. I've got to stop drinking by myself.
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
Randomize
