ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
I want to shoot him sideways (so he can still breathe) in the Adam's apple with my little crossbow.
Randomize
