if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
Why on earth are you answering my texts promptly? Thought for certain you'd be caught up in some ridiculous orgy by this time.
I'm that good.
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
Hey, don't blame me for the shitty evening; I wasn't the one who promised hookers, Dos Equis and foster kittens. Keith was.
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
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