Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
I am literally so hung over that I just opened up my emergency kit, got out a survival meal replacement bar and ate it.
I’m home.
I’m aware. I just dropped you off.
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
Randomize
