I just passed one of the bars and saw my mom kissing another woman. This can't be good....right?
Knowing your life, probably not.
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
Randomize
