I'm drinking while my friends build sand castles, now I know how my dad used to feel
you were passed out snoring, face down with all your clothes still on and 20 minutes later you sat up and said "FUCK YES" and then passed out again.
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
he said I could live with him because I'm cheaper than a dog and don't need a pet deposit. That and I don't piss on the carpet...
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
I accidentally walked in the wrong house but I somehow left with a chicken leg. Good fucking night.
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
I just realized that at some point last night I told someone I would only be friends with 16% of them because the other 84% stole my people's land
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
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