She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
Some guy on the train just glared at me. So I'm drinking tequilla out of a dixie cup. Go fuck yourself.
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
i dont even know how to be here
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
Look I'm really high right now, and if I were to leave this house, it would be for the sole purpose of getting an ice cream sandwich. So can you please just do it.
Randomize
