I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
Why would I want to inherit a sex machine used by my grandma?
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
woke up next to the new dishwasher. set the record for banging a new employee to 6 hours...i should be a professional sexual predator
Because I'm a hot mess throwing up in the litter box
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
Now when you said you'd never sleep with me, did you really mean never on a Monday or never without handcuffs or a blindfold or never on a airplane or never without lots of booze? Cus never is a pretty strong word.
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
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