why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
Randomize
