wrigley field is MILF paradise
ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
Don't worry about later. I already pre-ordered a pizza for a 1:45 delivery and told them to ignore any calls from your number.
You're getting good at this, you know that?
You drunk dialed me talking about the stages of mitosis. There is no way you didn't ace your bio final
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
75% of the time I swipe right on Bumble for girls over 40 is because I think their 18 year old daughter is hot.
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
Randomize
