as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
My freshman suitemate just walked into the kitchen to find my fuck buddy making chicken enchiladas without me anywhere to be found. Awkward or awesome?
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
Randomize
