Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
that trick or treat candy bucket that we used to collect beer money last night was very helpful when I vomited in it this morning
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
My night was too much. My morning is even more. Help. I need to teleport the fuck out of here.
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
The moment buddy the elf found out he was human is exactly like the moment I realized I was gay
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
Randomize
