i get turned down more than a collar. where are the desperate bitches i need to crawl to them
Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
He brought me hungover chipotle knowing full well he wasn't getting a blow job. I think he may be too in love with me.
Randomize
