he saw my "i like bacon" magnet on the fridge and i told him how much i love meat, then we started making out
what a beautiful fairy tale
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
"Bring the kids" is the most terrifying 3 words I've ever heard in my life.
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. It doesn't matter what it's about. Last text was about a homeless dude
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
I forgot to respond before, I was apologizing for confusing sex with secret Santa.
There's even glitter on my cock...
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