I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
I'm sober enough to realize she looks like a man, but drunk enough to do it anyways
You left a trail of sequins from your dress incase we got lost
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
I walked into the bathroom and there's this 6'5" cop washing his hands. He looks at me and goes, "Heard you singing outside. Sound real pretty."
No more tequila EVER.
The dick lei will go down in squad history
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
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